Amy Wilkinson stepped into the void... - 1/11/07

New Canaan Rotary Club Bulletin January 11, 2007

As 12:15 approached and no Nancy was in evidence an obviously worried Hunter S. was heard to mutter, “E.T., phone home.” No one’s cell phone rang until much later in the meeting, and then it was only Marty Skrelunas taking a call from Philip Johnson.

Fortunately next year’s Nancy [Pelosi], the formidable international banker and all around financial whiz Amy Wilkinson stepped into the void and called the meeting to order. In a first time occurrence the Pledge was done as a round, with the group in the food room coming in following “flag.” Then visiting pastor George Baker offered a blessing which contained the words “short” and “small” at least three times each, and that provoked more anxiety regarding Nancy’s absence as it was impossible not to think of her during George’s remarks. This led to a truly miraculous event as the apparently absent Ad Tomaselli suddenly materialized at the head of the food line. Although we all know it is his well-deserved and rightful place, Ad’s mysterious appearance added to the unsettled mood of the meeting.

Another almost unbelievable event occurred as, with no explanation or fanfare, several shiny new badges appeared in the shadow of the badge box. In one case, Fred Baker who was a new member about this time last year and had decorated his uniform in obvious despair at ever receiving his badge, had difficulty finding an appropriate spot from which to hang it.

As there were as many guests as presidents in the room, Amy moved to the announce ment segment of the meeting and Bill Walbert rose to confuse us. He sat back down, but then rose again and further confused us. Gentle Ben Bilus then stood all the way up, which seemed to alarm the unruly crowd and it was some time before order was restored. By that time Mike Hobbs had apparently dozed off and was humiliated to discover that Ben had just answered the question Mike asked. Except for Joe Rucci, everyone just let it go and shrugged it off as the pathetic mutterings of an old fool. David Bryant looked visibly relieved when Ben returned to his seat without making any menacing moves toward David. Apparently the Christmas unpleasantness has not yet dissipated.

Last resort Sgt. Frank Bernardo rose to terrorize and extort the troops. It is good to have Frank come amongst us on occasion to remind us how really loud he is. Your scrivener”s ears are still ringing, and he has no idea why Frank took two dollars from him. Yet another mystery.

Amy then introduced the day’s program, ex Rotarian, George Megrue wannabe, son of the former Darien Building Inspector, physicist Michael J. De Leonardis who explained about Pluto, the weather and meteors threatening the earth. Pluto is apparently still at Disneyworld although not still a planet [no eliptical orbit and all]. Mike, responding to a question about whether or not he could predict the weather on earth by analyzing sun spot data, replied that he could, but not accurately. Most of the audience lost interest in the program and virtually everything else when Mike informed us that, as he spoke, there were 832 meteors one to six miles in diameter and capable of extinguishing all life on earth, hurtling toward us. The program seemed to make the previously mentioned occurrences moot. Amy thanked Mr. DeLeonardis and everyone left.

Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche