There were maybe a dozen chaps milling about...July 24, 2014

ROTARY BULLETIN

July 24, 2014

 

            There were maybe a dozen chaps milling about the room when Eric rang the bell at 12:15, led the pledge and delivered a concise blessing.  With a gentle northerly breeze blowing in a cloudless blue sky and the temperature at 74 degrees there was little to fret about.  The chow line quickly dispersed and we soon swelled to three tables with tardy appearances by Baker (John Adams), Risbridger, Rucci (elder), Hobbs (younger) and Engel.  Crunch followed Munch when Eric (who had read last week's blah) rang the bell with authority and began with grateful thanks to Laura for standing in (up?) for his absence last week.  Several announcements followed, including the advice that next week the speakers will be John Bemis and Lisa Oldham with an update on the Rotary Exchange Program.  Laura Einstein is the Lobsterfest ticket maven and she took a minute or so to caution each of us to retain the envelopes containing the allotted tickets per each member.  Something about data entry and retrieval and the added shock of a $35 ticket price. 

                Sgt@Arms Scott jumped to the fore with another scatological low in taste but he did set about extracting serious shekels from his rounds.  John Bemis spotted a fin for Leo's efforts   at a turnout for last Saturday's Summer Theater's Hairspray.   Marty refused to cough up for his celebrity status in the Advertiser.   George Baker followed up on Keith Simpson's testimonial to Briggs Geddis .freshly penned this week in the Advertiser.  George recounted a Town Council subcommittee meeting when Briggs was unable to get past Joan Ballots to make his case. 

 

                Ken Campbell introduced Brandon Armstrong as our speaker, and what he said might have prepared us for the near chaos that ensued.  Brandon had two tongues in both cheeks and is clearly a second city refugee or maybe a Hasty Pudding contributor to the Lampoon.  Good on his feet and quick as a flash, Brandon fished for titters.  We were treated to a few absolutes, namely onion.com does exist.  He admitted to journalistic bias and told of his quest to smuggle the original Sanskrit Adam and Eve manuscript from the bowels of a Cairo crypt.  We learned of SSD (stupid student disorder, and that God is invisible, but with the correct application of Benjamin Moore's Eternal Enamel (or was it Sherwin- Williams?) some people believed they could crystallize the issue.  By now, the tittering turned into a low wavelike static and had lulled Eric to sleep, who was incapable of bringing the proceedings to a halt.

 

                                                                Vladimir Putin